The Rise of the Lonely Man – Is there hope?
- 11 September, 2022
A recent article from Psychology Today has made us aware that there is a rising curve of lonely men. Studies show that almost 40% of the population between the ages of 25 – 45 are without a partner. This is a steep increase of 30% over the last years.
Out of that group, men make up the ones who are alone for the longest time at a time. Contradictory, they are also the group that benefits the most from a partnership. As many as 62% of the men who make up the male distribution on dating apps feel that they are gradually being excluded from the dating market.
One of the biggest reasons is not only the selection but according to the female counterpart, a general trend of lacking the skills required to be in a relationship.
We often as people imagine how the grass can be greener on the other side, and not least how we can get there as quickly as possible.
One of the ways we do this in love is in the form of a swipe.
On most dating apps, there is an uneven distribution of men and women. This can make the men fight for the attention of the opposite sex.
When contact occurs, the men end up shooting with no ammunition of communications, hoping to hit the right prey.
Often, the battle between standards and expectation becomes evident in this exchange. This is also because the standard is not the same for all women.
The difference is also not always communicated by the female counterpart. This can lead to a slow phasing out of conversation instead.
The lonely man is not only an outgrowth of their own silence but also of the women’s. There is a need from both sides that are not being met and as with all other requirements, we are responsible for putting them into words.
Expecting others to meet your need without them being expressed, is not realistic. If that is expected, you can end up disappointed in several instances of life, but especially in dating and relationships.
Most people are not mind-readers and especially not men.
It could seem that there has been a reassessment of the way in which we meet each other. This is manifested via the dating culture through higher standards and lower tolerance.
Out with the interchangeability, and easily-bought familiarity. Enter emotional availability and an open line of communication.
This can be seen as reaching out to both sexes. An expression that all parties want something special, but that socialization and lack of own resources can be a hindrance.
This is a development that needs both men and women to extend themselves in order to meet each other’s needs. We all do the best we can with what we have.